One of my last commentors mentioned how she doesn't do scheduling because it doesn't jive with your personality... and I just wanted to say, that I am so glad to hear that!! For me, I HAD to do scheduling when my son was born. The structure allowed me to KNOW what needed to happen next. I am such a "made-mom" that I had no natural instincts as to what should happen next and what was normal behavior and etc. So the scheduling works for me. I am so glad that there are parents that do it differently, and that I can learn from the wonderful things that they do too! Oh, I just relish in the differences, especially when we can learn from each other!!
In other news... We've been busy working on our "living with less" mission. We have downsized almost every aspect of our home. Our garage is cleaner (there is space between the remaining boxes now) and our closet has space. My husband has down sized his wardrobe almost by half. He is much better at this than I am! We have cashed in on all of the items we've posted on craigslist or ebay. I wish that our last final things would sell... We started going through our photographs. We have a HUGE bin of photos and old photo books. We decided that in order to downsize this section we should scan all of the non-digital photos and then upload them to a server somewhere to store them. And then trash the paper copies... So, this has been my project this week. I started on Tuesday and have scanned over 1600 photograph from Jr High, High School and College, as well as our Wedding. UGH! I have several hundred more to go but am more than half way done!! Then the next project will be to categorize them (or complete it, as I did most of this work on the front end) and then begin the process of uploading them.
We made our 4th trip to the GoodWill since we started our quest. I hope to only have to make one more trip. But Ken seems to think we're only about half done. But I think we're getting closer than we think. We'll see though!
9 comments:
I'm so glad you weren't offended by my comment:) Of course, I didn't mean it in an offensive way, but it's so hard to get that across sometimes online!:)
I think it's totally a personality thing, and I'm so grateful that I don't have to work outside the home, because I know I'd have to schedule more then.
We do have a scheduled bedtime and have ever since she was about 2 weeks old -- we just had to have that established for us as a couple to be sure we still had alone time in the evenings.
But other than that, no scheduling...and it works beautifully for us, as scheduling works beautifully for others:)
So glad Penelope is sleeping again! We've always found that B figures her sleep issues out on her own faster if we just let her than if we interfere...but of course that's a non-scheduler talking:)
Ha! Blogger told me my comments weren't going through, but just checked and saw they all did:) I deleted 2 of them, so as to not be totally annoying and redundant:)
Oh I so wish I could work on downsizing. I can hardly move right now and I am afraid that tons of junk I don't need is going to be moved into the new house just because I can't physically deal with it! The thought of throwing away every other box that comes out of storage has been VERY tempting...but when it comes time to put the boys in the next size up for clothes or when I need a stock pot to cook supper, this plan may not be the best :o)
Erin - Great job on your cleaning/purging! I know I've told you before, but I LOVE purging! Sometimes I want to throw away EVERYTHING in our basement storage area...But then I would probably miss some of the stuff (keepsakes, etc). Isn't it freeing to not have to worry so much about stuff? I hope our house sells soon - then I'll be motivated to purge more as we pack! Ooh, speaking of that, do you have any news about your possible relocation?
Oh, and I hope I didn't offend anyone with my Babywise comments yesterday. To each his own! I'm sure in 20 years when our kids are in college, all of them will stay up late and sleep through their 8 o'clock classes, regardless of their scheduling as babies (or lack of it)! :-)
You certainly didn't offend me, Lacey! I think it's great to hear what works for others.
I think your point before, Lacey, about making sure your world isn't "child-centered" is so important. And even though we're not schedulers, it is why we established a bedtime for Brooklyn SO early on. It was so easy to just let her sleep in my arms way late into the night, but I felt it was important to establish that Jay and I were a couple and needed our time alone together still, even if she wasn't exactly disrupting anything at 2 weeks old, just sleeping away:)
The one thing I've struggled with in regards to some friends who schedule is how important they make their own sleep and how it seems to be their only parenting goal for months and months -- sleep. I always felt like my primary goal was to show Brooklyn how much we love her and that we'll always be there for her, and for us that meant a more relaxed philosophy about sleep...and the fact that she slept 5 hours straight the first night home from the hospital helped my stance on sleep:) Not that she kept that up for very long!:)
I don't think anyone who commented sounded like that though...where the parents' sleep trumps all else, no matter what.
My mom was blown away by how much my friends focused on sleep -- my mom said "My word, when you slept, you slept! We didn't do all this training stuff!" Oh how times have changed:)
I have to admit, when I read babywise I was coveting my sleep. But at the start of my scheduling with Finn, I did it more to "gain control" over the daily routine. I am not a "born-mom" and I was lost without a guidebook, especially in the beginning. I also felt that scheduling gave me something to focus on and kept me from falling into depression in those early weeks. After reading it, and adopting it, I heard and read many mom's speak against scheduling because of what you mentioned (the "hurry-i-have-to-leave-baby's-gotta-nap" craziness) and I was afraid that my kids would be like that. I referenced the book again and the author devotes a whole section of the book to being flexible. To allow your kids to keep playing or take that doctors appt that is during nap time. Because that's life. And kids need to learn how to do it. We have to teach our children through those "off schedule" times. But when we were at home, we had set nap and bed times to create a routine for them. Like lacey said, I agree that when they are 18 yrs old, it wont matter whether we schedule or didn't. Our kids will know they are loved if we put love first. Thanks for your comments, ladies!
I was thinking about this after reading about your charting -- I was a nanny, and I journaled for the mom what her daughter ate, when she peed and pooped, etc. just as I had working in a daycare previously.
So when I had my daughter, I was like "Woohoo! Freedom!!!" then she lost the maximum of weight she should have lost, and they had me charting her wet and dirty diapers! I was going "No!!!!! This was supposed to be different!":)
And as soon as she gained weight, you can bet I stopped charting again:)
But I think what you say is so true about being a "made-mom" (a term I love, by the way:). I had worked with kids since I was a kid, and as my job in and out of college, and while being a mom is a totally different experience, I did have a lot of the skills needed already, and perhaps that is why I'm more laidback in my approach?
I'm so glad to hear that BabyWise has that chapter -- I read it as a nanny when the mom wanted me to read it to help her understand it all:), but I don't remember everything about it for sure.
And the whole doctor's appointment thing...non-scheduling leads to "Sure, we can do a 10 am appointment, no problem!" and then having a child who suddenly decides she'd like to take a nap at 9:45 instead of 1 pm:) Oh well!:)
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